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| zwirnm |
 Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 12:19 am |
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Joined: 30 May 2004
Posts: 46
Location: Washington, District of Columbia
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I will be the first to say, that when I saw glenn mcdonald's "Chris Whitley 1960-2005" on the front of www.furia.com, I gasped but immediately assumed I knew the cause. I've seen Whitley in shows brilliant and appalling, and at times he's been frankly incoherent and obviously stoned. Knowing his substance abuse issues, I figured he had overdosed. (Of course, giving his chainsmoking, I may actually be describing the same process, in slow motion.)
I think Whitley was a genius. Entirely unreliable and frustratingly aimless at times in his artistic goals, but an utterly unique talent and one of the most distinctive musical figures of his time. Like glenn said, I didn't even like all his records, nor all his performances, but it's a dreadful disappointment to hear that there won't be more of them. |
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| chillywilly |
| Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 12:23 am |
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Joined: 20 May 2004
Posts: 8250
Location: Salt Lake City
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Kate wrote: Just to throw this out, feel free to ignore, but I travel alot and have decided that Kid A is one of the best albums to listen to while winding your way through airports. The meandering tones and robotic like sound are perfect for the sensation of being in constant, fluid contact with strangers.
I'll have to try that when I get back in the air again, since you can't just wander the terminals anymore without a boarding pass.
While we are on the subject of Radiohead, The Bends is always a great listen while biking. The sounds seem to match the pace I ride at, slowing down and coasting during "Fake Plastic Trees" |
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Chilly
"If you should die before me / Ask if you could bring a friend" |
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| ehle64 |
| Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 4:37 am |
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Joined: 20 May 2004
Posts: 7149
Location: NYC; US&A
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| Absolutely worst song of 2005 has got to be "My Humps" by the otherwise and usually charming Black Eyed Peas. The song is pretty revolting all around, but I do stop to wonder if Fergie has ever had a mammogram. How crass to call her tits her "lovely lady lumps". Usually when a woman finds a lump in her breast it's devestating whether it be malignant or benign. |
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It truly disappoints me when people do something for you via no prompt of your own and then use it as some kind of weapon against you at a later time and place. It is what it is. |
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| Mr. Brownstone |
| Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 6:31 am |
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Joined: 21 May 2004
Posts: 2450
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I had some high hopes for the Peas coming off of Bridging the Gap and Where is the Love? with Timberlake, but their albums and singles now sound... I don't know, unmusical? It's like dropping in on a party you don't really want to be at.
There was a gossip blurb about how the Peas were performing at some social function, and Harry Dean Stanton was there, who kept complaining to a friend during the Peas' set that "this isn't even music."
I wouldn't go so far as that, but I just don't get what they're doing anymore. |
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"My name is Gunnery Sergeant Major Highway. And I have drunk more beer, pissed more blood, banged more quiff and knocked more skulls than all you numbnuts put together." - Clint Eastwood, Heartbreak Ridge |
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| Kate |
| Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 9:37 am |
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Joined: 20 May 2004
Posts: 1397
Location: Pacific Northwest
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ehle64 wrote: Absolutely worst song of 2005 has got to be "My Humps" by the otherwise and usually charming Black Eyed Peas. The song is pretty revolting all around, but I do stop to wonder if Fergie has ever had a mammogram. How crass to call her tits her "lovely lady lumps". Usually when a woman finds a lump in her breast it's devestating whether it be malignant or benign.
By the look of the video, I thought the idiotic song was about her ass. It is revolting. Pump it is good for the treadmill though. |
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| marantzo |
| Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 10:24 am |
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| The Black Eyes Peas played at half time at the Grey Cup game. I don't know if I've ever heard them before, but after about a minute and a half I switched channels. Awful stuff. |
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| Mr. Brownstone |
| Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 10:24 am |
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Joined: 21 May 2004
Posts: 2450
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I actually started putting together a rough list of worst songs ever:
1. Bad Boy for Life, P. Diddy.
This isn’t even a fucking song. What the hell is this? That’s a guitar riff? How the hell did Puhdiddy rope Dave Navarro into appearing in the video, because you know a sickass riff master like Navarro would have come up with something better than this jack-in-box wackass broken guitar string of a riff Diddy mumbles over. And “I don’t write rhymes, I write checks?” So now it’s cool to NOT write your own lyrics? A critic from the New York Times once claimed the Sopranos was the greatest piece of anything in the last 25 years of pop culture. Now, this may be over-stating the case for the admittedly solid Sopranos, but I don’t think it’s hyperbole to argue, to claim, no, to INSIST that this “song” is the worst hunk of hairball catshit ever hocked up on the unsuspecting innocent American populace ever. WORST. “SONG.” EVER. EVER!!!!!!!!!!
2. Bungle in the Jungle, Jethro Tull. Intolerable. Folk rock for nerds, as if that wasn't redundant.
3. Roundabout, Yes. A Yes album is like 60 minutes of listening to ugly people masturbate.
4. Seen All Good People, Yes.
5. I Can’t Dance, Genesis.
6. Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue (The Angry American), Toby Keith.
Yeah, that’s what America’s all about. Kicking ass. Kicking other people’s ass. And doing so without an ounce of self-reflection or a conscience apparently. Hey, dickhead: Wanna go kick some ass? Sign up. The military’s still a voluntary institution as far as I know, and considering how many of our troops are getting fucking shot and blown up and it seems we don’t have enough guys to stamp out evil all over the globe as God apparently told George W. Bush to do, they’d welcome a gung-go fire breathing shit-kicker like you. Of course, you won’t. Instead, your fat ass will continue to sit around om a porch somewhere ingesting pork rinds and beer, rabble-rousing ignorant fucking hicks to support a fight they, like you, will never have to throw down for. This song is the musical equivalent of “Bring ‘Em On.” Explain this to me, you fucking chicken-ass warmongers: How does 50ish wannabe hippies assembling for a peace march in Saginaw, Michigan endanger our troops by “providing aid and comfort to the enemy,” but the President of the United States of America getting on global television and daring terrorists around the world to “Bring It On” doesn’t endanger troops? You know why Republicans who hate the Bill of Rights always use the term “providing aid and comfort to the enemy” when referring to pro-peace citizens? Because the term is considered the definition of treason. That’s right, folks. Wishing our troops wouldn’t get sent to the other side of the world to fight a war on the wings of innumerable lies is treason, but lying to the American people, fabricating evidence, violating the rights of our own citizens and wiping our ass with the accords of the Geneva Convention while daring terrorists to attack our troops is just good ol’ patriotic leadership. We’re through the looking glass, people. But don’t worry, Toby. You’re a chicken-assed fat ignorant pussy fuck no matter which side of the mirror you’re looking through.
7. I Was Made For Lovin’ You, Kiss. One of the worst bands of rock goes disco. Couldn't be worse if Schwarzenegger sang it.
8. P.I.M.P, Fifty Cent. Isn’t it time to say the emperor has no clothes and that Fifty is just as wack-ass as Ja Rule? Sure, he could take him in a fight, but nobody’s saying Vin Diesel is a better actor than Edward Norton just because he could give him a beat down. Firstly, I’d be more impressed if Fifty went after Suge Knight, or Glenn Danzig, or Dave Mustaine, or some of those fucked-up death metal guys from Sweden who eat each other’s brains and shit. Defenders of Fifty argue that whether or not Fifty is really all that tough is inconsequential. I’ll stipulate to that sentiment, if Fifty fans can accept the fact that Fifty’s fake-ass posturing as a tough guy is yet another ploy in an apparently endless parade of fake-ass gangstas who used to sell a little weed on their block and maybe jacked a couple of fools for wearing Mercedes pendants to allow a bunch of suburban white boy buttheads to indulge in their fantasies of whupping ass. Again, defenders of Fifty and his ilk of stupid-ass rap would argue that the rhymes aren’t to be taken literally or seriously. But I don’t know. Fifty’s got his kid wearing a flak jacket on tour (here’s a thought: if your toddler’s at risk of getting gatted, don’t stand him up on stage in front of thousands of people every night - send his little ass to school so nobody shoots his stupid ass 15 years from now for selling a dime bag of weed on the wrong side of the street.), so it seems as if he takes himself literally and wants to be taken seriously. The argument is to forget the actual text of the rhymes Fifty doesn’t so much as spit as he does slobber because his tunes are just theme music for a party. Which brings me to my most essential point about the disappointing devolution of rap: It’s today’s hair metal. It’s aimed at the same kids: suburban white boys with a tough guy posture. Both forms arose from respectable genres with good intentions with great bands - hair metal from early 70s blues and stomp rock like Zeppelin, Sabbath and Aerosmith and punk acts like the Dead Boys, the Ramones and the Sex Pistols; today’s hip-hop from the more socially conscious, almost militant intelligent rap of the late 80s, early 90s personified by Public Enemy, A Tribe Called Quest, the Beastie Boys, and even NWA. And much like the ancestors of these genres produced some great artists - Guns n Roses, Metallica, Van Halen and the Cult, and their hip-hop equivalents: Eminem, Dr. Dre, Snoop and Tupac, respectively, they also produced cynical corporate shit: what else is P. Diddy but today’s Bon Jovi? Ja Rule our new Poison? And Fifty Cent becomes our Def Leppard. Hell, they even sing about the same shit. Hair bands sang about kicking ass, fucking chicks and partying. All today’s hip hop acts not named the Roots, Black Eyed Peas, Kanye West and Common have to talk about is kicking ass, fucking chicks and partying. So there you go. Fifty ain’t the next ‘Pac. He’s today’s Warrant. Sure, Fifty got shot. That don’t make him tough; that makes him an asshole large enough for someone to get pissed off enough to pop a cap in his ass, and in his mowf. You wanna impress me? Move back into your old neighborhood and build a community center there, so nobody gets shot, ya mush-mouthed soundin’ Jani Lane poseur.
9. Parents Just Don’t Understand, DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince. Even parents understand that you suck, “Willenium.”. Will Smith is quite possibly the worst MC ever. His rhymes are so wack, so soft, so Vanilla Cookie Crunch biteless he’s his own after school special. Seriously, worst rapper ever, worse than Vanilla Ice, worse than the perverts from 2 Live Crew. Fuck, William Huang could have done I Think I Can Beat Mike Tyson. And at least then it would have been funny.
10. We Didn’t Start the Fire, Billy Joel
11. From a Distance, Bette Midler.
12. Mr. Roboto, Styx. Tommy Shaw’s all pissed off at Dennis DeYoung for turning prog rock act Styx into Journey-lite, and demands DeYoung come up with a rock song. Apparently hating Shaw with every fiber of his being, DeYoung unleashes this bag of cyber-kinetic vomit, which obviously requires a video in which DeYoung dances around in lavender baby pajamas while being pursued by giant men that look like Twiggy from the old Buck Rogers TV show. Unforgivable.
13. Too Much Time on My Hands, Styx. Tommy, you suck almost as bad as Dennis. If this was your idea of rockin' away Babe, you are delusional.
14. Jenny From the Block, Jennifer Lopez. Of all the things in this world to worry about, whether or not J-Lo has allowed fame to change her certainly ranks in my top 10. Yours, too?
15. Cherry Pie. Warrant. Waaaay more responsible for ending hair metal than Nirvana. A literal genre killer, the jump the shark moment of metal.
16. Follow Me, Uncle Kracker. Third grade lyrics, second-rate production, 1st rate suck.
17. Girls Are Nothing But Trouble, DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince.
18. Kokomo, Beach Boys. Just in case you were wondering, Uncle Jesse from Full House is playing the bongos on this song. Wipeout.
19. What More Can I Give?, Michael Jackson. If you get to the end of the song, you find out the answer is a back rub to a ten year old boy.
20. Shine on You Crazy Diamond (All Parts), Pink Floyd.
21. The Girl is Mine, Paul McCartney and Michael Jackson. Of course, McCartney won this battle for the titular girl, because while he was figuring out the piano medley, Jackson was in the studio restroom trying to blow the studio technician’s 10-year old visiting nephew.
22. The Man Behind the Mask, Alice Cooper. You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.
23. What the Man Says, Wings.
24. Don’t Let it End, Styx.
25. Remember the Time, Michael Jackson. What is wrong with black people that they keep guest starring in this freak's horrible marathon videos?[/i] |
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"My name is Gunnery Sergeant Major Highway. And I have drunk more beer, pissed more blood, banged more quiff and knocked more skulls than all you numbnuts put together." - Clint Eastwood, Heartbreak Ridge |
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| marantzo |
| Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 10:36 am |
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Many of those I don't know but The Girl Is Mine and What the Man Said would be on my list too. I'd also add that piece of dreck Ebony and Ivory by the same duo.
I like Kokomo though. |
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| tirebiter |
| Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2005 12:35 am |
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Joined: 20 May 2004
Posts: 4011
Location: not far away
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So last night I had to go to something that lasted three hours and was all in Afrikaans and it got a little tedious-- but right in the middle of the program there was an appearance by "The African Inkspots," 4 guys who've been together for 58 years and sound like they just stepped out of a 78 recording of the Inkspots from the late forties. They're all in their 80s and have never been recorded.
I was almost brought to tears by the sound of these old wise men. Fifty Cent came here last year and made a million dollars for one performance-- and these guys have never been recorded... I'm looking to scare up some funding to get them into a studio before the Grim Reaper makes the job impractical. |
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| unohoo |
| Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2005 7:14 am |
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Joined: 30 May 2004
Posts: 210
Location: Houston, Tx
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| Dude. Michael Jackson's "Remember the Time"?. I still had some residual hatred for the man leftover from the 80's back then but that song and that song alone brought him back into favor with me. (take that back, "Smoothe Criminal" created the shift) Matter of fact I might have to break out the tape box and see if I can find my copy of "Dangerous". |
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| unohoo |
| Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2005 9:23 am |
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Joined: 30 May 2004
Posts: 210
Location: Houston, Tx
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I meant to comment on that list of worst album covers that Rod posted from pitchfork. It's not that I didn't recognize how corny Main Source's "Breaking Atoms" album cover looked, but I remember being slightly entranced by it back then. It was a goofy cover sure, three funny looking heads intently looking at a needle drag across a record creating a spontaneous whirlwind of multi-colored 'atoms'. But it made sense to me, because it spoke to the sort of record worshipping that goes on within hip-hop and how that process stimulates the other processes of producing and rapping. Not only was the rapper the producer in the group (sort of making his two dj's obsolete), his name was Large Professor, and that album is a bona-fide classic. "Hangin Out", "Peace Is Not the Word", "Friendly Game of Baseball", "Lookin At the Front Door", and "Live at the BBQ" which was Nas debut.
Somebody mentioned "Kid A", a few posts back and that album took a while to grow on me, but now it is one of my favorite Radiohead albums. I imagine it would sound cool in an airport "Everything In Its Right Place", "How to Disappear Completely" and "Idioteque" jump out as songs tailored to experiences in the airport. (at least if you're alone)
On another note, "Ok Computer" used to be what I used to run to faithfully a couple of years back. The first three songs on that album were to be listened as one. On some High Fidelity steez those three songs would rank # 1 on my best opening three songs by a group list. |
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| Mr. Brownstone |
| Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2005 9:48 am |
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Joined: 21 May 2004
Posts: 2450
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unohoo:
Remember the Time is awful, as is the interminable video.
Even prior to the allegations of boy sex, I thought Jackson was a vastly over-rated artist. I can literally count on one hand the number of good singles from his solo career:
Human Nature
P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing)
Billie Jean
The Way You Make Me Feel
Smooth Criminal
...And that's it. Thriller is the most ridiculously over-rated album I've ever heard in my life. Beat It is corny, saved only be Eddie Van Halen's one take guitar riff, and Thriller the song is inexcusably awful - any song with a Vincent Price voiceover is terrible, I don't care how long the accompanying video is. |
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"My name is Gunnery Sergeant Major Highway. And I have drunk more beer, pissed more blood, banged more quiff and knocked more skulls than all you numbnuts put together." - Clint Eastwood, Heartbreak Ridge |
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| marantzo |
| Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2005 10:48 am |
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Michael's ex-wife has said that their children were conceived by way of artificial insemination from an unknown source.
Does anyone believe this slander? Has the world gone mad? |
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| chillywilly |
| Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2005 12:48 pm |
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Joined: 20 May 2004
Posts: 8250
Location: Salt Lake City
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ehle64 wrote: Absolutely worst song of 2005 has got to be "My Humps" by the otherwise and usually charming Black Eyed Peas.
I very much agree. Saw the video as well and agree with Kate's assumption. It's pretty bad and avoidable, unless you listen to top 40 or hip-hop radio stations. |
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Chilly
"If you should die before me / Ask if you could bring a friend" |
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| chillywilly |
| Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2005 1:01 pm |
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Joined: 20 May 2004
Posts: 8250
Location: Salt Lake City
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Tim... your worst song list is pretty close to mine, with a couple of exceptions.
Cherry Pie - actullly a hair metal album that I listen to on occassion. Must be the song "Uncle Tom's Cabin", which I do think is a pretty good song.
Tommy Shaw - While I agree with you on some of the songs he's done, in general, I think he's one of the best things in Styx. James Young is the other one that ranks pretty high in that band. And to be honest, I have to give Lawrence Gowan credit for being talented enough to sound like Dennis DeYoung, without being the asshole in tow.
Other than the above, your list pretty much hits it on the head. I'm sure I'll think of some to add. |
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Chilly
"If you should die before me / Ask if you could bring a friend" |
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